The LEAST interesting cyclist in the world

I saw that Carlos Sastre is in the break at the Vuelta today and I start thinking about how this made me feel...to be honest I felt like I just took a sedetive.  I am sure Carlos is a nice enough guy, but he is also the most boring rider in the peloton.  He is the the opposite of this man:

"When I am lying in bed with 3 women and must finally fall asleep, I watch the 08 TDF. I am out like a like in 10 min."

I'm not sure why his attacks look like they are in slow motion? I'm also not quite sure why he Phil & Paul refer to him as a "climber" when he get dropped as soon as the road tips up? Carlos is pretty much the San Antonio Spurs of cycling (with less hardware).  Just for fun ask people who won the 2008 TDF then just watch them?  They will pause, then realize that wasn't the one Floyd won/got stripped of, Must be Contador...no wait he didn't race....ummm...Sastre? Still not sure what kind of pictures/info he had on Riis, that allowed him to win the TDF?

I think some time riding with Rock Racing would have done Carlos some big favors and loosened him up a bit. Cipo could have mentored him on having a bit of panache.  At this point even if he tried this trick, I am afraid I might not be able to watch it for more than 3k.

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